Another important concept I learned from Brad Blanton is that true honesty, directness, and even intervention is like a combustion engine.
What most people do is bring up their deepest intentions and viewpoints thinking something bad’ll happen, so right when they bring it up and turn off their recipient, they get scared and run away!
No no no…
STAY IN THERE! Duke it out. Get it ALL out. Tell them how you feel. Tell’em why they make you angry, sad, etc. IN PERSON of course. Yeah it’s gonna hurt… which is even more reason to stay in there and let it all out. If you don’t stay and keep it up, that’s what’s gonna cause more long-term suffering. But in that case, at least you’d begun opening up a can of worms that can be discussed further, rather than going along your business hiding that fact.
It’s not just an explosion. It’s a SERIES of explosions. You explode once, and that one explosion feels like a big deal. But you keep it up and it’s like a combustion engine. Getting hotter and hotter… enough for transformation to occur. Even if you both end up crying, it’s REALLY good. Tears are a sign of transformation. What happens are signs of growing up and creating a space to reconnect and rediscover each other. It allows you and your friend, companion, etc to wipe away old, obsolete history and form a REAL one. REAL communication. A REAL bond.
Mama
I’ve always been the kind to talk back to my mother since a very early age. I’m the only one of my siblings who really does that. Yes, I’ve made her cry, and it’s made me feel like shit, BUT… at the same time I also have a completely different relationship with her than my siblings. They try to appease her. Hide and sneak around and not be open with her. I tell her when she’s being stupid. 
We get into it and learn more about each other… which especially helps since her understanding of English sometimes gets in the way. She speaks English well, but not like natural-born American. It’s really hard trying to articulate to someone that they’re smothering and suffocating you when they don’t know what that really means. But she gets the picture.
She understands now that I view God in a MUCH different way than she does. I let her know that the only reason why I go to Church and do the lector readings is for HER, and not so much for myself. (If anything it helps me practice public speaking and I get to pick up on the priest’s mannerisms.) We have an open and honest relationship, no holds-barred, no hiding. And while it sucks sometimes, I’d rather have it no other way.
Think of someone important to you, and don’t be afraid to let them know what’s up. Do it in a way that lets them know you care. It will help you know who your true friends are. “True friends stab you from the front.” When you learn how to speak this way to people, you become stronger in yourself. You open up communication doors and it’s freeing. You learn who your true friends are and you screen out the rest. You learn to not give a fuck what anyone thinks of you, and you find out what other people can handle and how they best respond to things.
Life is a social experiment. Be willing to commit social suicide quite a number of times. Best to push your limits than to lead a life of mediocrity. Such a thing is worse than death.
-TeddieBe
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